I look back on my time as a child carer and scoff that I gave out advice sometimes. Especially right now after an epic tantrum from my Little Madame that has resulted in her falling asleep 1 hour before tea time. I took some drastic measures after her behaviour became less than favourable over the last few days. I began to not see my lovely little girl but a girl who only thought about what she could get for herself. I didn't like it especially when she was so demanding and dare I say ungrateful. I decided it is high time she appreciates what she has instead of always thinking about what she could get next. I have removed all her toys from her room except for her books and her cd player. She has been told she can choose one activity at a time and when she would like something else her current activity must be packed away once she is finished with it. She chose to keep her dolls and doll house furniture and then on day 2 of this venture she decided she would like to use the blocks and train set. I told her that she could but before she begins she must go and pack up her dolls and furniture. Then it begins!!! She began to tidy and because I was feeding the baby I was unable to help if she needed it. I explained this to her and when she had trouble she got very loudly frustrated. I asked her to come and tell me what the problem was and we can work it out together. Little Madam began demanding me quite rudely to help her screaming and carrying on so I told her I would not be helping her because of the way she spoke to me. Well, the "I hate you's" came out after this and that she only wanted Daddy to live here ( he'll be chuffed to hear that lol). Little Madam decided to put herself to bed but her bedroom light was on and after screaming at me to turn off her light I explained to her once again I will not be doing this for her because of the way she has spoken to me. She got up and turned the light off herself. I walked away to leave her be as she really needed the time to calm down. I went back a few minutes later she was lying there eyes open I spoke to her saying she is being taught a lesson that will help her as she grows. I am happy to help her always but there are times when she needs to do things for herself. I explained also that her little brother is going to have to learn to do things for himself when he gets bigger too, and that I do a lot of packing up on my own (including messes that she has made). I made sure to tell her that she is such a smart girl and she shouldn't waste her brightness on being rude and demanding but put it towards being strong and kind. I went to go get Little Man ready for bed as I passed her room she was asleep and still is. I gave her a kiss tucked her in and closed her door over to give her some peace. I do not feel guilty for the way I have handled the situation, I kept calm but wasn't cold. I now just have to wait for her to wake. I have 3 scenarios in my head. 1. she wakes up and gives me a kiss and cuddle we go to her room and finish packing up ( I help a little bit). 2. she wakes up grumpier than ever demanding food, screaming at bathtime and in a mexican standoff waiting for these bloody toys to be put away. 3. She sleeps until the morning, wakes up in a good mood, has her brekky, packs up the toys and we enjoy a nice day of errands and groceries. I am hoping for 1 or 3 but anticipating 2. I'll let you know how I go :)
How have you handled terrible tantrums? What do you do after the dust has settled?
Fi
xx
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